Who do you want to be today?

January 31, 2006

Mood: Sleepy…just woke up
Music: Who Do You Want To Be Today?, Oingo Boingo
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2
Book: Second Foundation, Isaac Asimov
Weather: Drizzly…but it’s early yet

I’ve decided that I’m not really sure what I want to do for a living.

This probably won’t come as a surprise to people. I’ve never really KNOWN what I wanted to do for a living. I mean, there was a time I wanted to be a soldier (you know…when I was about 5…) and there was the time I figured aerospace engineering was for me (just before college), then I wanted to be in politics (when I actually got to college) and then since politics fundamentally sucked, I decided that media was my move, and I got a degree in Film and actually got a job making television commercials…which fundamentally sucked anyway.

The older I got, the more I realized that I wasn’t ever really going to have this burning fire behind my eyes about a job. What really made me happy was doing ANY job well. Yes, there were tasks I didn’t really like, and there were jobs that I wouldn’t do, or do again. But if I had some of the basic skills to do a job, I realized that what I really liked was being good at something.

Here’s my problem. I’m not really really sure what I’m good at any more. I mean, I think I’m pretty good at a lot of things. This isn’t really idle boasting. And I’m not talking about playing the harp, or sewing, or standing on my head. (And I’m definitely not talking about eating well and exercising.) But when it comes to most business-related topics, like dealing with spreadsheets, creating presentations, writing statements of work, creating plans for execution, motivating a team, and so on…I think I’m pretty good at it.

Now, is the trick to apply those skills to an area I like? Or is it something else? I kinda like the whole digital space…iTV, interactive, videogames…and I have some real experience in those areas. Do I stay there? How do I find a job there? I’d imagine there are technical recruiters…maybe I contact them?

My only curiosity revolves around the whole “you didn’t think of it, but you’d be really really good, and HAPPY, doing that.” And I don’t know what THAT is. So I put it to all of you…what do you think I would be happy doing? What am I not thinking of?

Isn’t there a test where you enter in what you’re good at and what you like doing, and it tells you what job you should have? I’m pretty sure I took one of those in High School…(although I’m positive it said I would be an excellent mortician.)

Help Glenn get a job. It’s now officially one month looking for a job with no nibbles. I’m clearly doing something wrong. Help a brother out.


Nothing like a quick shootdown….

January 26, 2006

Mood: Vaguely grumpy.
Music: Remind me to reinstall iTunes.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4
Book: Foundation and Empire, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Cool and clear.

First, to my lovely Landry…I feel reasonably certain that you simply transmitted said cocktail…you didn’t actually PARTAKE of it. Not your fault. If you had partaken, you’d KNOW it…because your browser would explode, and every 5 seconds, a popup window selling some bullshit product would appear on your screen, preventing you from doing anything else. You know, when your machine wasn’t ground to a halt attempting to search your hard drives for interesting data.

Don’t sweat it. It’s gone. I still adore you.

OK, anyway, so about 3 hours after applying to those jobs at Expedia, they sent me emails saying that they weren’t interested. I suppose it’s a mixed blessing.

I’ve applied for about, say, 30-35 jobs so far. Aside from Expedia, who shot me down in hours, only Starbucks said “No, thanks…good luck with your job search.” After a few weeks, you don’t really harbor any hope that those people will call…but it’d be nice to get a “We’re not interested because of X.”

Now, who am I kidding? I’ve looked through THOUSANDS of resumes in my previous jobs, looking to hire people. Hell, I’d throw a resume aside if it had a single misspelling or if I just didn’t like the color of the paper that day. And I certainly didn’t have time to write a little note telling each person why I’m not even going to look at them. I vaguely wonder if any of those people looking at my resume said “I don’t THINK so” the way I used to when someone with not nearly enough experience applied for a job that he or she clearly couldn’t do. And then I tell myself that I’m being paranoid.

I KNOW the trick is to get noticed…am I going about this wrong? I cleaned up my resume with substantial help from Thorn…but maybe the resume is now…non-descript? I could be anyone. Perhaps I need to revisit my resume. Again.

The problem I’m having is that after speaking to so many people, my resume has drastically changed so many times, that I have no concept of what makes a good resume any more. Some people like buzzwords. Some don’t. Some people want a lot of detail. Some don’t. Some people want punchy one line descriptions. Some disagree.

I have NO idea what my resume should look like.

And all of this is freaking TRIVIAL, since once someone actually SPEAKS to me, they’re going to realize that I have a TON more experience than I could possibly put on a single sheet of paper…or even allude to.

Yes, I’m feeling a bit discouraged. I’ll get over it.


No one said it was going to be easy, son.

January 25, 2006

Mood: Hanging in there.
Music: None.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4
Book: Foundation and Empire, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Grey again.

Where to begin. It’s true that I’m not updating as much as I want to be. I know nothing’s keeping me from doing it…it’s mainly a motivation thing. Lately, it’s hard to get motivated to do much of anything. Yes, I know that’s a classic sign of depression. Trust me when I say that I know depression pretty well, and this ain’t even close to being clinically depressed. This is just mopey.

A few days ago, a friend of mine “sent” me an IM through AIM which basically installed a vicious cocktail of adware, spyware, and hid the primary agent with a rootkit. Those of you who haven’t been paying attention to the news, a rootkit is a piece of software/code that basically hides OTHER code from the OS. The net effect of a rootkit? The OS can’t see or target the code that’s been hidden. Doesn’t show up on virus scans, once you find it through sneaky means, you can’t target it to delete it. I, of course, found this out some eight hours after scrubbing my system top to bottom (removing some 12-14 pieces of spyware…) only to find on reboot that they were all reinstalled in a matter of seconds. Found the offensive piece of software by using arcane commands, only to find that I had no permissions to remove it, even in a raw DOS boot. Fabulous.

Bought a new hard drive, installed it, put in a clean install of Windows, then blew the other OS folder away. I didn’t lose any data (thank god or other benevolent or non-sentient supreme being or force responsible for the creation of the universe and other small lucky things happening to yours truly) but I DID lose a day’s worth of sanity. I have said it before, but I’m deadly serious. If I EVER meet any of these FUCKS from Aurora or “A Better Internet” I WILL be needing bail posted.

Anyway, I won’t be installing AIM again…because I don’t freaking trust it. Thorn recommends Trillian…and I might try that again. Wasn’t impressed the first time, a couple of years ago.

Anyway, I still haven’t gotten any nibbles on my job search. I applied for a few more jobs at Expedia just before writing this. I think I’m pretty well-qualified for the Senior Producer position at Expedia…but who knows any more?

I think that’s the hard part, really. I know, truly, that if they actually call me or write me, and just INTERVIEW me, they’ll hire me. I have a lot to offer an organization in the digital space and from a process perspective. I am a VERY good manager, especially of creatives and tech people, who are notoriously finicky breeds as a rule. I am well-known for getting things done, especially difficult things, and on tight schedules. I KNOW online production…and my experience bears that out. I have dozens of references in the industry who would back me up on all of this.

I just can’t seem to get anyone to call.

This is typical. I have never, ever, had to apply for a job cold. I’ve always had someone say “Oh, hey…come on in and talk to these people…they might want to meet you.” Every job, from Broadcast Arts to TEC, someone said “come on in and meet these folks…they might want to hire you.”

The obvious problem is that I don’t KNOW anyone in Seattle. We knew this going in.

I WILL say this: I’m very happy in Seattle. I love living with Chelsea, and I enjoy the atmosphere of Seattle. I don’t miss New York. I miss my friends there, of course, and I miss a number of restaurants. I miss Fresh Direct (although Thriftway ain’t bad….), but I do NOT miss the weather and cold in New York. It hasn’t yet hit below 40 since I’ve been here, at least not during the day…and the costs of everything are about 2/3rds what they are in New York.

I’m sure it’s a matter of persistence and time. My money’s holding up pretty good, and as long as I find something in the next 3-4 months, there won’t be any problems. In the meantime, back to the online job hunt.

Seeya, Limewear.com

January 16, 2006

Mood: Happy.
Music: Space Oddity covers.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4
Book: The Complete Robot, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Cool, Clear

Still don’t have a job. Will make some phonecalls today to see how the resumes are taking hold. Still revising my resume with Firethorn’s help.

Naturally, as can be expected after 2 months of not working at all and Christmas, money’s getting tight. Not drastic or anything…just a little tighter than I feel comfortable.

So, of course, that’s when my Karma takes hold.

On Saturday, I got an email from someone interested in buying the domain name limewear.com. I wrote back, we conversed a bit, and in short order, I sold the domain name.

Let’s be fair…while sales at cafe press have been OK, they haven’t been stellar, and I haven’t really been putting any time into it of late. Additionally, I’m working on dissolving the company and such. I don’t need the headache of additional tax returns and such. If and when I decide to spend my life making tshirts, I will do all the paperwork I need. Right now? Not interested.

Basically, the store is still there…http://www.cafepress.com/limewear…but limewear.com is now pointing to some placeholder of the nice man’s choosing. I asked him what he’s doing with it, and he’s starting an online service, and wants the traffic that limewear.com brings. It IS true that I generate about 15000 unique visitors a month…which ain’t bad as far as driving traffic, really. If some guy in Australia wants it…Limewear can do without it.

Anyway, the sale of the domain name will cover my expenses for about 2 months…and if I decide to reprint the labels and hangtags without the domain name, I’ll just have to cover that myself.

Pretty good news, really.

Oh, and NFC Playoff tickets go on sale today at 10am. Not a huge football fan…but NFC title game? Maybe I’ll give it a shot….*UPDATE* I tried…but they sold out in 2 minutes. I kid you not. Oh well. :)


January 13, 2006

Mood: Rested.
Music: Space Oddity covers.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4
Book: The Complete Robot, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Cool, Clear

I was woken this morning by Chelsea at around 6-something AM. I don’t KNOW it was 6-something…but I sorta deduced it from clues after the fact.

She woke me up because we had no power in our apartment.

You live in apartments long enough, you know that this occasionally happens. Breakers, whatever. I get up, flip a few switches in different rooms, check the fridge, sure enough…no power. I stumble to the breaker panel and confirm that none of the breakers are out of position or tripped. I open the front door, and the hall is dark, so it ain’t us…it’s the building. I check out the window, and the 7-11 sign that’s always on is off. Well, there’s your dead giveaway…isn’t just the building. I say so, and go to stagger back to bed.

Chelsea isn’t too happy about this turn of events, as I suppose I wouldn’t be if I had to go to work, and she asks for some help. So I again stagger to the closet to retrieve the flashlight I ALWAYS have somewhere I can get it just in case, and give it to her. She gets ready as best she can, pretty aggravated, so I act the good fiancee and get the hell out of her way, and crawl back into bed. Chelsea and I have a brief conversation about the flashlight, as she needs it to get down to the garage and out to work. I tell her to take it, and not worry about me…I have no need for a flashlight, seeing as I intend to be very asleep in short order.

I am somewhat awake at this time, so I go to sit on the couch and watch the sunrise, slowly, as I think briefly that just about every form of entertainment I could muster at that moment requires power…whereupon sleepiness hits me, and I crawl back to bed.

When I wake up at 9:30am, the power’s back on…so I do the morning shower and such, set the clocks on the kitchen appliances, do some laundry.

This morning has vaguely reminded me to get all my disaster gear set up again. No, I don’t expect a “disaster.” Most “disasters,” like a temporary power outage, merely require a flashlight or two, a radio, some bottled water, and some duct tape and plastic sheeting. That’ll see you through a good chunk of the things that can happen if you live in a city in an apartment.

Living with someone else changes some of that. I need another good flashlight, obviously. I need a battery-powered radio. I need the other stuff…just in case. Water leak, broken window, blackout….

After 9/11, a store opened up not too far from where I was living in lower Manhattan, which sold things like radiation suits and geiger counters, respirators and what I like to call “paranoiaphernelia.” Stuff that no sane human living in the US properly needs. I don’t subscribe to being that “prepared” regardless of the fact that I now live in the Pacific Northwest. I’m certain that should an event pass that would require such measures, I am not going to be giving too much thought about where I can get a geiger counter, nor kicking myself for not having one.

After the blackout in NYC (and indeed, most of the Northeast…) people started keeping flashlights and water. Not to brag…but I had always kept such things. I know what it’s like to find yourself in your apartment with no power for a few hours. It happens…at least once a year. Fallen power lines, flooded power vault, blown transformer, whatever. While it ain’t exactly life-threatening for most people, it can be boring, or whatever. But a flashlight keeps you from stubbing your toes (your house/apartment is probably darker than you think with no light coming from outside at all…) or falling over your shoes. Water just in case you get thirsty…or need to wash your hands or face or something.

In any case, that’s something I’ll be taking care of today/tomorrow…and I need to stock spare batteries for the flashlights, too….


January 12, 2006

Mood: Can’t sleep. Upset stomach.
Music: Soundtrack to Firefly.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4, Amped 3
Book: The Complete Robot, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Cold, actually some sun today.

Here’s the resume I’m sending out. Opinions?

Still at it.

January 10, 2006

Mood: A bit tired, but pretty good.
Music: Soundtrack to Firefly.
Game: World of Warcraft, COD2, DOA4, Amped 3
Book: The Complete Robot, Isaac Asimov.
Weather: Cool, grey.

Well, I’ve applied to at least 20-25 places so far. I’ve thrown resumes at Microsoft and Starbucks…but I’ve mainly put my hopes at small gaming studios. I really would like to get into gaming. It’s a bit late in the career to get started, but I have experience, and it’s really something I WANT to do…which would be a novel concept.

Haven’t gotten any callbacks yet. Understandable. Been at it for a week or so, and it IS just after Christmas…people getting back from vacation and all that.

Anyway, my prime gripe today is World of Warcraft. Now, I don’t mind a little wait time every now and again to play a game…2-3 minutes doesn’t bug me. On Sunday, the queue was, no shit, 600 people, and over 45 mins of wait time. Now, I don’t know about you, but if I have to wait 45 minutes to play a game, I’ll find something else to play or do. Additionally, if you DID actually get in there, the server performance was so awful, you were taking your character’s life into your hands if you did anything remotely risky.

Frankly, I liked the idea of queues if it increased performance for players. I also expected it to be a sometime thing…you know, at holidays or whatever. No. Lately it’s been every Sunday and Monday night, and then some.

The decreased performance is horrific, and the number of people on our server just seems to be getting bigger. I’m SURE a chunk of it is knock-on effect. You have a big server, and all of a sudden, a mess of gold farmers and item farmers log on to grind the hell out of everything to sell to the large populace. The economy sucks, and you can’t play or get any items yourself, because these freaking farmers are sitting there ninjalooting everything that moves before you get a chance to do it yourself.

Admittedly, the price I pay for unlimited service isn’t all that high…but the QUALITY of service I’ve been getting lately is beyond awful. I get in to play sometimes, and just log back out…because the server is choking already, and I don’t want to play on a stupid server.

I started an alt on a new server…but naturally, since it’s a new server, there are a million level 2 players running around spamming tells and yells, challenging anything that moves to a duel, and generally being morons. Yeah, I could probably outlevel them…to a degree…but in the meantime, I end up dealing with idiots for a week. Not all that enjoyable…and the lag doesn’t really go away when you have that many people in a zone.

I hope they do something soon…although I can’t imagine what that would be.